Non-compete clause

I was not born with one competitive bone in my body. I never cried for not winning a game (maybe because I didn't make the team), I never had to be the first one done with my timed math tests, I never did anything incredibly stupid to win over a guy and I definitely didn't try to be my parents' favorite.

Until becoming a parent, the only thing I think I have ever been competitive about is competing for first chair in band, and that was only because I was fighting to be the young cute teacher's pet...not to get the best percussion solo at the concert. Let's face it -- I was only competing because I knew I would win...do you know what kind of DORKS are in middle school band?

Parenting is competitive. It doesn't matter how much you try not to play the game...just put a group of mom's together and the boxing gloves come out. You are right smack in the middle of the competition of your life.


Jeepers is 2.75 years old. He isn't potty trained and isn't interested. He has been known to toss out more than one, 4-letter word at the approriate time and he has most recently been punished for intentionally hitting his "friend" square between the eyes for no reason with a golf ball. He hates to brush his teeth and he really hates library story time because they show crappy filmstrips and he has to sit still to watch them. He refuses to drink milk without chocolate and he loves to drink Diet Coke. He loves to watch Man vs. Wild and The Deadliest Catch. He eats candy and loves Doritos. He can't pedal a 2-wheeler but he loves his JEEP Power Wheels.

If the competition is eating healthy and always being on your best behavior, I definitely have some work to do.

He is joy to be around. He tells me he loves me 100 times a day and gives the best hugs ever. He slept through the night at 12 weeks. He loves to snuggle up with me under the covers and read books with a flashlight. He cries when we I take him to daycare and tells me he missed me when I pick him up. He loves a good game of tennis in the cul-de-sac and he is excellent at watering the flowers. He has lots of friends and he is getting pretty good at sharing. He says "hi" to everyone he sees when we're out and asks to call his gramma on the phone. He always uses please, thank-you and excuse me at the appropriate times and he takes 3 hour naps. He sleeps in his own super cool bunk beds and he loves to take baths and play in the water at the beach. He can sing the ABC's and sometimes he knows his full name. He can count to 20 and only miss a couple of numbers. He always asks me to stay home when he knows I am headed out the door. Sometimes, after we are done reading stories he still asks me to rock him to sleep.

You see...life isn't always perfect. The best competition in mothering is to be the best that you can be...then you'll always win.